Oh, July

I have recently realized that I don’t understand things I should understand. Some of these things include banking, investing, and health insurance. So I have been trying to educate myself in those areas, and I feel so stupid for not educating myself on  my ridiculously incondite knowledge before now. I could have been investing this whole time, and I haven’t! I definitely wouldn’t have signed up to bank with Wells Fargo, that’s for sure. Blah, blah, complain, complain. 

On my birthday, Seth surprised me by knocking on the front door with a chocolate cake full of lit candles. It was rather adorable. He also gave me two books, one of which is about Henry the VIII and why he SUCKS! and the other is about some Jewish man in China. Thennnnn, we ate at The Madison, which is a newer restaurant in Provo. It looks nice, but the meals kind of taste like I made them. Such a thing should never ever happen at any restaurant. Ever.

My parents also came for a visit, and I didn’t get to see them very much. Liam mostly complained about how gross Utah water tastes, even though I am rather positive it tastes like Idaho water. My parents took us out to Chinese and pizza, which was supa nice. Although, Liam wouldn’t eat the pizza because there was chicken on it and the music at the restaurant was too loud. I worry about that child.

Tomorrow, I will be in Iowa. I can’t wait.

UNTITLED!

My apartment obstinately stinks of smoke.  A few days ago I was convinced something in the house was on fire; then my brain turned on and realized it was Utah, not my apartment, was on fire. In reality, the fire is far-removed from Provo, but Provo Canyon is asking as a wind tunnel for the smoke and drenching the town in it. The clouds need to get the hint and RAIN!

I recently saw Bill Cosby with my parents. It was a “sit down” comedy, because I think he is too old to stand for two hours. He told funny stories the whole time, and I laughed too much because my face was sore the next day. I also appreciated that he was wearing sweat pants and a hoody for his show. If he is touring in your area, GO SEE HIM! You will only regret seeing him if you are lame, and you are not lame.

Then…I went camping with my sister and two of my cousins. We went to Bear Lake, which happens to be one of the ugliest places in existence. But the lake is cool. So we sat out on the sand and got sunburned. When we put up the tent, we found a large, squashed rat. Someone had probably slept on him the night before.  I personally slept on spiders, or at least that is what the bites all over my leg tell me. The best part was our dinner: cosmic brownies, donuts, chips, sour patch watermelons, and starbursts. That was also our breakfast.

In August I will be flying to Iowa for friend’s wedding. I haven’t seen most of those wonderful people since high school, and now they are all getting crazy-sophisticated degrees, have jobs, or are having babies. Weird. I am super excited to see them, and remind them how socially awkward I can be.

Seth and I will also be going to Arkansas with his family on some houseboat lake thingymajob. The South is this mysterious, strange place to me, which makes me a little nervous and excited to go. I hope everyone has accents and eats chitlins. Yeah, I stereotype.

Oh, oh, and I finally read the “super amazing” The Fault in Our Stars that everyone talks about like it is a book god. I hated it.

And happy 4^th, everyone.

Tax Return. I Shall Save the American Economy Now.

A few days ago, Seth did out taxes and found out we are getting a rather generous tax return. This makes me rather happy. Now we just have to find out what to do with it. (I refuse to save ALL of it, because I am just not that fiscally intelligent. Seth will buy a Samsung Note Phone, even though they are made for giants and monsters. We might also go on a cruise. Maybe we will just retire…for a month. I hope ya’lls got tax returns up the wazoo, too.

Today was the first day I was given my first proposal to write all by myself. I confess I feel a lot of pressure. If all of my proposals are rejected, I shall feel like a writing loser. It’s crazy how a good work environment makes you want to do great work. NEVER WORK AT A TERRIBLE JOB. Seriously, if you hate your job, never stop looking for another one. 

But I really do work out...

I sit for at least two hours in my car every day. In between these drives I sit in an office for eight hours a day.

So when I am not listening to a book on tape, I am listening to crazy-awesome dance music. And while I listen, I kind of dance. Yes, I dance in the car. Sometimes people look at me like I am crazy. Maybe I am a little crazy, but sitting still that long is torture! Now I actually enjoy my rides home.

The next time you see someone jamming out in their car, JOIN THEM! Or mock them. Whichever.

These past few nights I have been working out like a beast. I had a personal trainer yell at me for an hour, and I am in serious pain. I thought I didn’t have trouble pushing myself at the gym, but after my whole body was shaking, and I was practically crying to the trainer that I couldn’t do anymore, he made me do more.  Yeah, it turns out I am not as strong or flexible as I thought I was.

So what is the moral of this story? Work out more than you think you can! Then don’t wear heels the next day.

I loves you alls.

My new job is full of wonderful things.

People bring in their dogs in Fridays. One of them peed on the cactus.
All the walls are windows.
Everyone is laid back, but good at their job.
I like to write!
The break room is brimming with free food.
They feed us lunch every week.
My boss is a geniussss.

The only problem is it takes anywhere from 40-120 minutes to drive here, depending on the day. Today was the 120 minute kind.

Also, two friends, Tessa Roberts and Shayla Sasser/Sturgiss came over for hotpot last night. I love hot pot! We have a gazillion mushrooms and nasty beefballs left, though. Perhaps I shall actually eat healthy this weekend, because I have no choice.

This is not an interesting post. Too bads for youz.

Tonigggggghhhhhhttttt, We are Young (Still Stuck in My Head)

I have been berated by a few people for not keeping up on this blog.

I got busy being lazy, ya know?

From now on, I shall be better, better, and better. 

One of the newer/more exciting parts of my life is that I got a new job. It is a company in Sandy, Utah, which means a longer commute, which I have no objection to. I will be getting paid a rather decent salary, with benefits I could give a high-five to. Plus, the executives do not seem full of mammonism or hate my new department, like my current company’s executives. Instead, I will be working with experienced technical writers and a fully-stocked break room.

I shouldn’t have gotten the job. I wrote “plants” in my resume when I should have written “plans.” And yes, the interviewers noticed and pointed it out during the interview. As you can imagine, a typo on a writer’s resume is kind of like interview suicide. I thought I was going to jump off a cliff (or the high conference table we were sitting at) and run away. So I was surprised when a few days later they called to offer me the job. I accepted the job offer, partied with Seth, and imagined what it would be like to be a big girl with a big girl job. 

I’m 24, so it’s about darn time.

Tomorrow is actually me last day. My boss is a rather nice guy and throwing me a “good bye” party. Then it’s peace out to my cruddy job. 

Oh yeah, and my sister is most likely moving out to Utah for college. I am most excited because now I can make her hang out with me sometimes, but I will regret not being able to mock her about the things I watch on Portlandia anymore. Here is a clip, so you get an idea what I mean: